#, *, or 9

Palin in a black leather jacket? I recommend a violet velvet skirt a couple of inches above the knee to go with it, but that will not make her competent as a federal dogcatcher, and certainly never for president. Doesn't the godawfully corrupt FBI have a few more questions for her?

When your name is Hughes, and you write a screenplay titled Walking the Cat, expect Morph the Cat out of Mr. Fagen-freak, and upon daring to approach Culver City, a gal who really does walk cats. Calling the security man after "Stinky" has stunk will not, however, lead to any more than H-man amusement when: 1) No contract for the lil' security car to patrol; and 2) No alarm on the public building to trip.

Nice try, but A) People do tell me things; and B) The real policeman awaits a substantial increase in his direct deposit after a future President Hughes deletes the oh so rotten CIA & FBI.

Don't panic, citizens! You will be safe in your scrubby bubble homes, and with such a "flood" of not very secret "secrets," how about an audio archive on this?

"Nine-one-one dispatch." "Good morning, this is President Hughes. I've just fired the Secret Service. Could you send over a few cars? It's 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue."

Get ready, GETTY IMAGES, because the D.C. policeman alredy has a track record of riding around laughing at me as I drive on the sidewalk.

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