Did I almost get abducted from this joint? Yes. CLUES, PLEASE, SHERLOCK. a) I was "brain jacked" at Paul "I got two kids" Turner's house into forgetting my wallet. (No money, no donuts--spies, don't argue); b) The Developmentally Disabled people employed at my favorite donut shop had been replaced with witches & warlocks who had nose rings, tattoos, and so forth; c) The owner said, "I wasn't here today, right?"; d) Three thugs (T-H-U-G-S) were milling around a PENSKE TRUCK on the lot when I departed. (.gov's, did I mention I left because <ha, ha> I had no M-O-N-E-Y?); e) Some damn cars chased me west on I-270 and south on I-170, which is where Bill Clinton (remember that land swindler?) almost hit my Mazda 323 with Air Force One in August, 1999, and if you want the exact date, I'll look it up, because Ken, it is just not classified, nor will Chuck and the gang's arrest records be "secret"; f) The pursuers became the pursued, because as Ms. Thomas said, there is a difference between driving, and driving, and you NASCAR spygirls surely get what I mean. Where did the Russell/Premier Inn "code word" POTENTIAL abductors go? Sabreliner. What is Sabreliiner? A place where you lease corporate style jets. Who am I? "The Aviator's" grandson, and a candidate for president. The WILLIAM V issue, we shall take up in London, England. Meantime, mind your own business, as my new not secret slogan is, "If I f### you up, you don't get up" (ever again, kooks).
Where is Doug McCoy, M.D.? If he died of some "rare disease," I did not do it, but the HOWARD HUGHES MEDICAL INSTITUTE might have "got him." Did I file a lawsuit in Maryland over that joint? Yes, I did. Why no progress? Ask President Negro.

Living proof that MICHAEL KAUFMAN is a thief, but he will be at the Goebel Mafia Center teaching his little "Digital Photography Class" on 01.17.11 Why is the Goebel Mafia/Nazi Center open on MLK day? What was that irate black lady crabbing at "Andrea Koval" about yesterday? Question, questions, questions, and I can ask them, too. How about my first Kaufman? ("cough man" in the crowd? Free LUDENS Wild Cherry samples from the Hughes campaign! Lutheran SS, repeat after me: "He can't do that, he can't do that!") In Maryland Heights, Missouri? What did AL FRESSOLA have for lunch? Has LESLIE LEVIN seen her lawyer lately? A genius chemist, that Kaufman, but his old gray spy dad was driving him nuts, and I did not realize it, but per usual, Hughes made the right call in rounding up Missouri's nuts and kooks, a hopeless task in California. Now I'm "nuts," .mafia? Selling snow to Eskimos? Business can't be too good, perpetually lying about William Charles Hughes. Did I mention the missiles up your asses when I make president? How about that Soldier Boy's Internet! It's not just for usaf e-mail anymore. And, it even has naked ladies! [However,Hughes cannot look at mafia porno, or mafia says...whatever. We shall discuss the "Mothers Who Like to F^^^"/Brick Network business on CNN, even though this already got a KMOX anchorlady killed, then what? Palin will be out of the race? Most likely, dude. Oh, and what did Kathy Evans, a shapely 40-something year old woman with a red American pickup truck say about all of that?(In Granite City, Illinois) Seems her son's 17-18 year-old buddies would be so rude as to sexually proposition her divorced self, and Kathy said, at a Chestnut Health Services staff meeting, "They wouldn't know what hit them!" Then, when Kathy wisely and abruptly quit, Ms. Showalter asked repeatedly "Why did Kathy quit?" Don't know; possibly something connected with then Senator Obama. Get the scene with KSHE blasting out of the Ford Tempo and Showalter and I arguing like spouses out front of Mainstay right in the movie if we die. Why did her Marine boyfriend toss her cell phone in a pool? What's the name of that silly Marine camp in North Carolina? Gone! [Howard, they're trying to kill me from laughing too hard, and this, too, is not new].

Mister Donut is still around? In what nation? Japan? China? Speaking of China, they have to pay me back, or I'm pointing some missiles at them. Obama already did? Christ! At least that Negro has done one thing right. May I see a doctor for free? Not yet? I thought we turned socialist. Something went wrong? Girls, I don't get out much, and I refuse to fix the mighty HP C-300. Not when some twit at McDonalds will turn it off with a little black device, the nature of which is--another "inside joke?" I'm so important I can't stand it! May I run for president now?

1. You are not shot dead and later accused of trying to break-in the Iranian man's UPS Store [Corporate Colors: BROWN, and especially effective when you owe the man $3.00 U.S. for Verizon faxes that likely did not go the the Missouri Highway Patrol and other .gov type places. Oh, that Verizon! I've always wanted a phone company, Your Honor.]
2. The policeman, a rare clean cop in Cali-fornia, says "Get out there, it's alright." Where is "there?" Still under review by zebras in the booth.
3. Why, the very next night, a policeman, or sheriff's deputy in a cop car, pulls over a car <gasp!> where? At an intersection that has been very difficult for Candidate Hughes to cross. [BAD MI-6 JOKE? The street is named after a British general who was in a hurry. Hughes wonders, "What's the rush, kids?"] Reasons for the street crossing trouble we'll discuss at a federal courthouse when somebody is kind enough to transport me in their car (or flyin' triangle) out of this God-forsaken state I have alleged has broken off from the USA. [btw, is it six (6) "greats" in the grandpa department to get to WILLIAM IV? Nine (9) to get to...who? GEORGE III. Cosmic!]

WHY DO COPS LIKE DONUTS? (A Public Service Announcement From Hughes Aerospace)
1. They require no preparation.
2. They are cheap.
3. They fill you up fast.
4. They may, under certain circumstances, provide a 100% legal "sugar buzz," and I am just not talkin' your go*damn "spy talk."

Q: "What is bad for business at Starbucks?"
A: "Hughes, and the Secret Service helicopter flying north on Moorpark.

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