Just A Piece of Furniture

Something about furniture? Who are you, Lena? Who's the babe to your left on Page 62 of the totally decadent Malibu mag? Who is that on Page 66? Does the entire worldwide intel community know of my not-famous "Resolutions of 6/06?" That was in 2010. What year is it? Where are we, Deb Simcox? Who is the president, Commissar Blum?

Holy Toledo! Did I ever find my spy character "Rita" in that Volume 8, Issue 6 of Malibu! As always, Hughes must inquire, "Can she act?" Never mind, I'll teach her how, between sex acts in the trailer. Do I really have to send e-mail to the actors I want in my not even an offer on the script(s) James Bond really sucks, doesn't he, MGM? not a movie yet movie.

I have to "Line up and wait?" I know what it means when the Central Intelligence Agency won't release thousands of documents on the JFK assassination until 2017. Caroline and I might differ on this, you persistent murdering assholes! May I acquire my company on Germantown Road and fire missiles at my neighbors in Virginia, the CIA? They have a bad habit of firing theirs at unarmed A-rabs, don't they? Hey f###face, I read that in the neo-Nazi run Washington Post, so it must be true. What did the obvious .mil spook black lady say at that august newspaper when I dropped-off a little packet? "I take my job very seriously." I would too, if I knew what it was. Yoga pamphlet and a Columbian video crew? Was I about to pass out a la Charlie Hughes? Leaning on a D.C. lamp post really worked when U.S. Army virus attacked, and don't argue with me, or I might kill your ass tonight.

Hey .mafia, the button is in my seized Penske truck. Not that button, you creepy fool, the one from the Cornell Campus Store that said:
"MY JOB IS SO SECRET, EVEN I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING."

Have a nice weekend, and please, don't drive drunk or launch any ICBM's with nukes on top.

p.s. Are we getting this right yet? She knows a whole lot more than I do--this is a fact.