6.29.2010

Doomsday FOIA

They blew how many tires in Vietnam on 11.20.2006? Six? And, Georgie-Porgie, what was the "Doomsday Plane" doing there? Auto-brake left on? These things happen, right Cuckoo-Bird USAF? Did "Uncle Ho" have some ho's like...never mind.

I'll be the first to admit hollering, "Bush! War criminal!" and "Obama! Big crack dealer!" is not terribly productive, but I try to do it only where horses can hear me, as the man who tends the horses long ago gave me a $5 bill and uttered another of Thousand Thieves' favorite lines: "Get out of here, and don't come back."


I can say that from the big chair too, someday, and if you don't think so, consider this. The last U.S. President who was not, as I like to say, "Doin' some spyin'" was Gerald Ford, who found himself stuck with the job because Howard Hughes (yes, he was my grandpa, 'ya big dick) kicked Nixon's butt out. The erasures of tape? No mystery at all, really. It was Nixon himself on the ERASE button, and it was all about Howard--the erasure, not Watergate.

Give the "plumbers" a million bucks and then turn them in? I could do that, which might explain why I sleep under trees. It's a bit like the sign that tells all potential stickup men the clerk cannot open the safe. Did I really get a response from the Bush White House about COG exercises in 2006? Or, was it 2007? A big FedEx envelope it was, but I did not open it in anticipation of hiring a...what? Lawyer?

What's that? And, who needs 'em? What did Shakespeare say? Cause bodily harm to lawyers and create potential tort claims? Never! Why bother, when "they" know my lawyer categories: A) MAFIA LAWYERS, who pick every nit to skirt the law, and seek to put their enemies in the County Jail for jaywalking. I'm not making progress? Per the Kansas City Star, policemen are cracking down on jaywalking in KC, but how about that big crook Claire McCaskill (D-MO)? Lordy, if I get my capital, there will be no more Democrats walking free, and I've voted for the bastards since 1976! And, how about my: B) GULFSTREAM JET-CHASING LAWYERS, who are those guys & gals who look like fashion ads when they run to the SEC and shuffle my capital. I think they are now worried I might figure out who is trying to, "Take over the world" in the course of my duties as unofficial DNI.

A quick look at Hughes' Mayor of Gotham City resume finds a "central" question, and it is:

Q: Why did the gov'ment, through a multitude of spooky proxies, ask me many times if I would like to, "Overthrow the United States Government?"
A: They know full well how rotten they are, and don't give me any ideas, fellahs, if 'ya get what I mean.

Now I know White House love notes via FedEx morphed into connections at Kinko's, which is far better than putting up with that rowdy FedEx negro who worked for them in Memphis prior to making a mental patient career out of threatening to kill me every other day. Is that why LORI HARTLEY put a security guard in front of the Dielman Industrial Court office? Smoking cigs by the picnic table and conducting stare-downs with CHARTER CABLE, were you? Good thing I did not smoke at work, but I may have endangered the health of some spies by mentioning Charter's large stable of satellite dishes that all said HUGHES on them. Does my big MO Driver's License say that? Sure does.

No? [could the e-Mafia quit making a small case "o" large case? Thanks.] Excuse me, my name is really "Shickelgruber." (That's a 1970's joke, son). What are you loonies doing out here in California, anyway? Can I appear on a talk show? Here's a sure-fire laugh line: "All of America's kooks & crazies fled west, until they ran into the Pacific Ocean, then they dropped their "stuff," and that's how we got...CALIFORNIA!" Jesus! Do they do anything here like the other 49 states? Pass the bong, please.

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