Jimmy, Roll the Jeep (ZOOM, ZOOM)

The first thoughts of a homeless man in the early a.m. often lead to the "Outrage of the Day." My outrage a few days ago? Did I really pull up to the SUNOCO pumps, access the 260 Blend--or was it 280?--and drive a FIAT X1-9 that was not mine, because it was way cool, but a policeman was probably lurking behind every billboard & bush. Ah, but no tickets! It's all about what my departed buddy Dick Nixon told the real CIA: "Don't get caught!"

"Outrage Central" finds that X1-9 was the same color as the FIAT 124, DATSUN 1200, and VOLVO 240. How about my "burnt orange" AUDI 100LS that came later? 100? Thanks, I needed that, and the coated in many layers of aluminum foil cake delivered by a "hippie queen" at the MIFFLIN STREET COOP was appreciated as well. Real-time thoughts of the Hughes? "This is a cool little car, but I'll pass on the mid-engine design at tune-up time," because it was conveniently not my car. And, in the 1982 cake time zone, it was, "Gosh, she sure put enough foil on here."

"People know many things" is one of my sayings, and now I know why my by ill-fated marriage step-brother had only a "Work-Study" job, yet lived off campus, drove a sports car, and always had pretty girlfriends. No rash allegations here, USA, like nuclear terrorism, attempting to assassinate the president, and crashin' a Space Shuttle horse manure directed at me; heavens to Betty, no! Let's just do a simple "Me & Him" analysis, as follows:

WILLIAM: 3.5 or so GPA.
JIMMY: Flunked-out.

WILLIAM: Student Gov'ment Bossman.
JIMMY: Failed Soccer Jock.

WILLIAM: 24 hours of off-campus (hard) work.
JIMMY: "No work" Work-Study job.

WILLIAM: No auto accidents.
JIMMY: Rolled Jeep 2x, or was it 3x (I lost count).

WILLIAM: No "downers" (Remember Quaaludes, spykids?).
JIMMY: "Soapers" for breakfast; how do you think he wrecked the Jeep?

WILLIAM'S "FRIENDS": Defense Industry, Broadway, SNL, Directing TV Shows, Aiming Crusie Missilies, and much more.
JIMMY'S "FRIENDS": Check Leavenworth, Kansas & Marion, Illinois.

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