12.16.2010

Shoot! Shoot!

I saddled-up to the computer keyboard with intentions of writing a serious piece about Bashar Assad, Syria, Israel, what to do with the Golan Heights, melting the Eiffel Tower, and so forth, when my photo spread on google had the pic depicted above. It is from the beach during a State of Israel birthday celebration. The girl to the left with the cowboy hat on would normally be "my type," however, observe her competition. The pouty one in the middle? Oh yes! And, as for the one straddling the fence with the colorful whatever it is on her arm, uh, what I'm thinking is not fit for a PG rated blog such as this.

And now, Faruk, you big Royal ass, here's "the guys" in Kabul. zzzzzzz.

I know no one. I'm the Sgt. Schultz of the itel world. True! And, please tell Letterman, Leno, O'Brian, Ferguson, & Fallon I am sticking to my story until I'm on your little corporate puppet show and tell you where to stick it, and don't ask what "it" means, or I really, really will call the CHP, but don't you know the damn sheriff's agnostics will come anyway. I'm "nuts?" No, now I have it on good authority those guys are actually looking at this site. As for the capital NO that keeps showing up on my screen, despite releasing the shift key, don't you know what a judge said a long time ago on 7700 Forsyth? "Looks like he's getting serious about it." Not important! Why not? The janitor at the water coler is "The Man," and he said, rather disgustedly, "Hurry up and wait."

Line up and wait. Hurry up and wait. What's new in the H-act that is not an act? They are big on sign language our here in western Paki...er, I mean North America. So, I shuffle papers, straighten my back, and look straight ahead as if I'm waiting for someone with a camera to allow me get political on my own damn satellites. Did one "burp" during the 1989 earthquake out here? Yes, and I am from an Andromeda-like Galaxy (M-501) because I was watching the game. Back then, a "Network" was afraid the stadium would fall down and we'd see it, so they cut away, when the Hughes satellite stuff still worked fine. By 09.11.2001, I understand people splatting on the ground was considered news? Entertainment? And, didn't CEH and I discuss that fading distinction more than once.

I was so busy on September 11, 2001, I only saw Kathy Martin's TV for a minute or so (a both towers smokin' shot), and I think I went on record that very day in saying, "That can't happen by accident, that's got to be <gasp> terrorism." Back to work I went, and was kept updated by Shirley Lattimore our very lazy African-American secretary.


SHIRLEY: "Bill, one of the towers fell down."

ME: "It what?"

SHIRLEY: "It fell down."

ME: "All the way down?"

SHIRLEY: "Yeah."


-later-


SHIRLEY: "The other tower fell down."

ME: "What the fuck!"

By this time, Shirley was, as we mental heath people say, "experiencing coarse tremors" and I allege to Jay so-in-jail Nixon it had nothing to do with events in New York, New York.

SHIRLEY: "Bill, can I go home?"

ME: "Yeah, sure."

Then, it was Lori's 5300 Arsenal crack security men.

SECURITY GUY: "We're securing the campus. Nobody can go in or out."

ME: "That's nice."


Moviemakers, if I get my butt killed, don't get it wrong. I think by my usual and customary quitting time, it was just Danny and I in that big building with a dome on top, and as for the "What the fuck is wrong with the FAA? How could this happen? No fighter jets? How could this shit go on? I can't believe this bullshit!" etc. etc. etc...

...have you ordered the NSA's "BLUM-HUGHES GREATEST HITS BOXED SET?" Like T.O.DD's Oblivion and POV, I hear there are green discs, red discs, and FBC Blue discs. Navy Blue, too? Who let the .mil/.mafia in on this?


Don't vote for me. There would be no more military types in the intelligence community, and then they would clog-up intersections and Exit Ramps holding their cardboard signs scrawled with stuff like:
"Fired by Hughes"
"Hughes is Stalin"
"Hughes--Mao Worshiper"
"Hughes-More Communist Than Obama"
yeah, yeah, yeah

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