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Is the U.S. Army, like, the biggest welfare program ever? Or, is that the U.S. Navy? Hey bud light, I'm a civilian. Can I be Commander in Chief someday? Thanks--I don't believe in lighting off bombs to "make work."

Did that big RODENT, who never worked at the FAA one day in his life, and does not know Uncle Ralph, just say, "Promises, promises," at CPU #3, Goebel Senior Adult Center, Computer Lab, Thousand Oaks, California? I'm so ashamed of my not criminally liable "plan," I shall share it in a few minutes. You see, I really am Howard Hughes' grandson, I really am running for president, and I'm trying to make a f---ing movie, if you don't mind. Oh, I can't? Why did I bitch last Sunday that I could not remember DREW BARRYMORE's name, then she's on the front page of http://www.imdb.com/, a place I go often, since I don't really know any glittering H-town people yet. However, they all know me, and have been writing songs, making movies, and fussing about me in abstentia for many years--decades even.

Yes, JOE WALSH made fun of the bass player (Dan S.) from you-know-what-rock band. "Just another band from North County," in St. Louis, Missouri, right MOON UNIT ZAPPA? Moon Unit, I'll be looking for you and your momma, because I think there is at least audio, and maybe video, of the Zappa/St. Louis show (1975?) where the late Frank, Flo, and Eddie were making fun of 'po boy Hughes (me) right in front of me, as spies tend to do. What was the name of that Flo & Eddie album we played the crap out of on SIXTH Street, in beeutiful St. Charles, Missouri, 1977-1978?

Moving Targets? What does that mean? What does that mean? It means Mark & Howard got out of the band before...never mind. Where do they remaster those discs? CANADA! What did the border guard say to Hughes with four witnesses? "Mr. Hughes, now don't go buying up Canada." What did I say? What did I say? "I won't do that. Prime Minister Harper would be unhappy with me." Who was on the U.S. side of the bridge? Why that would be U.S. Marines. Unarmed at home, a bit too trigger-happy in "Sand Nigger" land, and son, don't you know you will hang from the neck until you are dead if I get in that damn White House? Lethal Injection? Are you kidding? So cruel and inhuman!

Oh, the people who, as I like to say, "Live for their spying" hear me say it loud: "Little Timmy McVeigh's of the future get fried, while President Hughes golfs 9 holes, because "we" proved at TOWER Tee, i cannot hit that f---ing little ball and make it go straight. Or very far, although an occasional good, straight drive is like "spy crap." Just enough incentive to make me waste time & money trying to be a better golfer. I did, however, brag to an old couple at the Goebel "Seizure Center" that I can get 'em up and out of the sand trap to the green. The lady who was said to be a champion golfer in her day looked at me and said, "but you're not supposed to be in the sand trap"

Yes, another big "Duh," because she was correct, and boasting about the wrong thing can get you into trouble in American politics, which is why I sit around and let all of you 1947 system killers do your little tap dance and snitch on each other--or whatever you do-- and wait. It's like dad at the Rexall Drugs, my ex-wife at the Clinique Counter...like that.

Zzzzzzzzzz.....did you say something? What are you talking about? Speak the King's English, please!