Erica, is that your real name? I come from a family where for generations, we have asked your national origin or ancestry, not because we're prejudiced, but because you have a totally fake name, and it is painfully obvious. "Weed," like the California nickname for pot? You know, marijuana. Let's "stall" for a minute, like the F-15A over KALDI'S COFFEE nearly did in Clayton, Missouri. How did you nutty Californians manage to change my political position on "reefer madness?" For my whole adult life (1973-Present), I thought the stuff should be legal, and for the record, I think it was right after my 18th birthday I tried it, whereas CA Youth often have been in rehab for hard drugs many times by then, if they live to turn 18.

"Stern," like Howard? I've been trying to marry-off a whopper spyin' girl to Howard Stern for years, but he's not divorced yet, is he? Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match...I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so... No, I'm turning Jewish, and that's why I am so sure Mr. Stern ought to get off my satellites with that smut of his, and settle down with the girl I have in mind for him.

From where does "Erica Weed Stern" hail? "Hailing frequency open, Captain" And, the "message?" "Bones! Have you got that batch of antipsychotic medicine ready for the 2010 a.d. LA water yet?" "Aye, aye, Captain!" "Very good. Spock, you're with us. Three to beam down."

SCROUGH, WIL SCROUGH. No, it is not pronounced "screw," like the objects in my cheap Chinese tires--more than once. Hail to the Chief? "Hit it once, son, and we're not going to hear that song again for four years, or three and a half, if I can get away with a quick economic "fix," and quit, like Nixon, only under some vastly better circumstances.

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