VC Math Class

LOU REED sings, on one of my favorite Compact Discs held by Mafia, "I've got stats, baby, I've got stats." Never mind the name of the tune is "Sex With Your Parents," or that Mr. Reed claims that parent-child sexual activity is a "Republican thing." New York? Did someone named "Rose" mention NYC about an hour or so ago? May I take a breather? First, may I be allowed to breathe?


Number, numbers, numbers! I cried aloud about them a lot in America's Best Value, which is a motel that somehow got castoff furniture from GREAT RIVERS MENTAL HEALTH SERVICES, but I never told a soul, until just now. Bottom line? They took me for about $3,300 I wish I had back, but DORIS did feed me on Thanksgiving, 2008, JAVIER did not kill me, merely stalked, and they galdly recommended old RUSSELL up at the Premier Inn, where I moved to with feet big as watermelons.

Medical problem? No way! Just more GEORGE JETSON TORTURE! What's that t-word? TORTURE! Really? Aren't you "Bipolar, and off your meds?" NO, I need a job with the vc Mental Health Crisis Squad, because they (I have a "they" too, now) tell me that with no hospital beds available, the patient goes to jail! Masterful how Cali-fornia criminalized mental illness so efficiently. Now, "they" are almost scared as I get almost famous, because I'm trying to make friends with the EMS Ambulance Drivin' girl.

Move--countermove. Who was that handsome young spyguy out there with her today? "That ain't gonna work" remains the Hughes credo, does it not? Why, that woman is a fast-talker, so I got the story about rolling down a highway embankment fighting with a supposedly "not dangerous" mental case, but she has not heard my, "Oh, I'm not helping with ward scrums enough?" "On three," said H-man. One..two..three, and down went a big Dingbat trying to fight during the, Dr. L's Been Kicked in the Gut Affair. Wasn't that a Movie of the Week on ABC?
Disney, I'll sell 'ya that one, before you bastards steal it, should you have a shareholders meeting and decide to send a few "token" execs to jail.

How about "The Water Man" story? "The Girl Who Really Was Rescued by Marines in Saudi" story? "Queen of the Trailer Park?" "The (nice to William, cheap-o ethics rap [not]) Pole Dancer?" House Full O' Guns? Which one? There were a few, sonny boy. Yes, I'm stuck-in with street sociopaths, so if I want to impress, I wheel-out the 100% true, "C'mon now, we're gonna clean it for you, hand it over. C'mon now" LOADED GUN STORY. To the CA hard-core I said, "It was only a crazy old lady," to which he replied, "A crazy old lady? In Missouri? She could have shot your ass."

True enough, and don't 'ya love cops, who all (4) had hands-on-guns as the lady waddled down the hall of her [LOCATION REDACTED BY BIG SPOOKIES, MAYBE GAYS AT MI-6] suburban home. Only later, after all of them had departed, did boss cop, a Lieutenant (I think), exhale and say, "Thanks, we've been trying to get that gun for six months." Uh huh, and that sort of tale will get me elected to something, no matter how flat-out psychotic you California people can be.

To the facts, "Ken/Kent/Nick!":
  • 112 million dollars more taxable revenue than Ventura, CA
  • 214 million dollars more taxable revenue than Simi Valley, CA
  • 270 million dollars more taxable revenue than Camarillo, CA

Hold on there, sheriff! In one fiscal quarter? No nightlife in "T.O." Not allowed!

No NAPA store--all gone!

Sears? Who's got money or credit anymore?

Good God, even the UK Kink's "Video Shop" (Ray, what a great sleeper good album, from when? Never mind.) moved away and left a note on the door that translated from "spy-ese" says, "We hope you all get killed."

Where's all of this economic activity?

CAR SALES i.e. "Zoom-zoom, let's gawk at Hughes."

HOTEL STAYS i.e. "Let's stay at the Mafia Marriott, and run-up Hughes' ass." (Don't I love drug thugs shooting their fingers at me--makes me feel unwelcome).

RESTAURANTS i.e. "Let's eat, eat, eat, and stare at our enemies, from the magesty of those spare ribs in FL, to the LUTHERAN SS sack lunch, let's eat! May I have a kickback, or something? No?

Sir/ma'am, I have eight fine screenplays for sale. Thomas Crown Affair II? I got a franchise like BOND for you! Help! Help" I'm 55 in Hollywood, and I do drive the speed limit, but they even pulled me over for that! Then, they wrecked my car! Help! Help! Who are "they?"

Touchdown! They're on strike? What? Mother of Pearl!!!

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